Sirens Sound

I left my wedding ring in a bathroom today
It’s made of wood, it would’ve rotten away
If I’d wash my hands of this: not having slept all week
There are hives on my skin and I am choking on my speech

There are cars on my street that honk at kids as they pass
The other week one stepped too hard on the gas
It drove up over the curb and into a house
There were no people living there, the rents had kicked everyone out

(my body sweats at night like it’s running marathons
and in my waking dreams I see you gently loosen from my arms
where that woman stands, I am certain that I’ve stood
but when she screams the sirens sound, and I am drowning in the pool)

I know this woman outside who swears to me she was caught
Outside of space and time where all our phones observe her silent thought,
That the highways cringe, throw my phone into a mote
While mountains crumble down in the apocalypse, I note

(in the bathroom where I hide, pretend that I’m immune to time,
pretend that your immune to lies, pretend that we can compromise
sing that everything-)

I hear the wedding bells come from the church near where I stay
Hiding thoughts like methadone and praying that I’ll be left sane
And I don’t recall there being bells when I got hitched
I guess the sirens drowned them out; lost out at sea, I just could not stay on the ship

Painting white the color grey, I have nothing left to say
I have nothing left to say, I left my wedding ring today
In the bathroom where I hide, pretend that I’m immune to time
Pretend that you’re immune to lies, pretend that we can compromise
Sing that everything is fine

Jupiter, My Love

O my king, O my king you are a clown
Draw on your smile, draw your frown
From the battles you’ve won you are renowned
From the cities you conquer with your crown
From the words in your mouth “it’s a patriot’s gain”
From the bills you have vetoed and the money you raise
From the wealth you inherit and paint on your face
O my king, O my king you are a clown

O my king, waive your glass, waive your stick
I am your jester to sing of politick
I am your love to live for your licks
I am your servant to fall for you tricks
I am broken and beaten, but wait for your touch
I am Adam and Eve, O your sight makes me blush
I am knights in red helmets, your enemies I’ll crush
O my king, waive your glass, waive your stick

O my king, O my king you are blind
You see nothing but freedom behind your eyes
You see neither the dark nor the light
You see neither the wrong nor the right
You see justice for me and justice for none
You see freedom with churches and churches with guns
You see letters in red on your constitution
O my king, O my king you are blind

I wrote left and now I write right
The flag waives high into the night
The soldiers will fight the good fight
My neighbor is sentenced to life
The maps they are drawn with boundaries in blood
The cities are drowned in wake of a flood
The jester will sing and cry, laughing, “We’ve won!”
And my king, O my king you were right

O my king on the cross you have made
Like Jesus, but ending in the grave
You’re like Jesus, but your end is in the grave

3rd Fall

I am here
I am here where you have buried yourself
I am here
Pools of doubt, buried, your bucket swings down

Down, down
I am drawn down
Down, down
Buried under ground

You are here
Nowhere is nothing that words cannot speak
You are here
Nameless, cast out by the family I seek

Peace, peace
I can never speak
Peace, peace
I can never see
Down, down
You are drawn down
Down, down
Buried under ground

Rise

if your hands are shaking, you might be your father’s son
if the news has just reported on all screens that you’re the one
and if traps lain with poison line the footing of your mote
i’ll be here to help you sort what’s in your soul

if your mother drinks to make your life like riding on a swing
if the people who remember things cannot recall a thing
and if kissing feels like pressing diamonds out of ancient coal
i’ll be around to help you sort what’s in your soul

if you can forget any problem that your hands could not create,
level out a field with flames, drain weightness from a lake,
if you cradle demons in your arms and hoist them up in full,
(if i’ve ever had desire, i don’t know that it’s my own)
You give gravity for drowning and in my place plug up the hole
and You rise to help me sort what’s in my soul

O House of Jacob (A Light Has Shown in the Darkness)

my sister lies in bed with all the blankets off
my father tends the garden to get away
my brother sits alone behind the television
the other hides his face as he prays
we all are hiding faces as we pray

my pastor never sleeps, he draws his eyelids on
my mother only ever stares at clocks
my uncle sings a song about the president
the other sings a song about his stocks
we all are singing songs about our stock

here, the choir sang
here, the hand of God wipes away
a penny for my whistle and my memories
and i will wake alone all of my days
o, i will sleep alone all of my days

my aunt can peel the layers of her faces back
her daughter hates the dark, hates the light
my lover screams and shouts about apocalypse
the other screams and shouts to start a fight
we all can’t seem to help but starting fights

my grandmother begs for change outside of a taco stand
my grandfather digs a hole where he will rest
my teacher says that war is where all the flowers have gone
the other says that war is just our best
i guess that we are all just trying our best

here, the choir sang
here, the hand of God wipes away
a penny for my whistle and my memories
and i will wake alone all of my days
o, i will sleep alone all of my days

last week a man was shot while praying on his knees
last week, a woman shot inside of a church
the boy who drew the gun and pulled the trigger back
well, he had never held a gun quite like that before
our babies have never held a gun before
our babies have never fought in a war
no, my babies will never fight in war

a candle for the light while praying on our knees
my babies will never fight in war

Father Abraham’s Lament

little hands behold
what the finger of our hope seeks to complete
mother make believe
what the images on screens cannot deny
all of your life, I take inside
what I despise and yet believe
the fairytales read in my sleep
dusty glasses worn for my lover
flowers from my pores, I am another

little eyes caress
beating lashes at your breasts to laugh and cry
sterilize the root
save you from the Shadow Brute that lurks and schemes
against me, against me
no, i cannot see the thing
that terrorizes shaking hands and feet
a painter painting, I know not the artist
a garden growing, where once my heart is

i hear footsteps in the patterns of the valves and tubes
i hear heartbeats outside caverns where nothing will bloom
i am breathing apart from me, i am living ghost
i see nothing, truth beside me where the shadows roam

you are hiding, i walk in the dark
save me from myself! i am pressed into the felt!
unborn children scattered at our tombs
save me from myself! i inherit all my spells!

bedsheets white with truth,
nothing we cannot choose
Father! O Father!
why have You forsaken me?

i can never see the truth, it is i who’ve abandoned you
no, i cannot see the truth, it is i who’ve abandoned you
o, my love, have we robbed each other’s souls?
o, my God, have i touched nothing but gold?

King David’s Lament

my shadow lies beside me when i sleep
and to it i sing a lullaby
and when we share each other’s dreams
he reminds me of all the times i’ve lied
he reminds me of all his friends who’ve died

my right hand holds a loaded gun
my left hand points fingers in the dark
and when they work at making love
o, they never miss their mark
o my god, i am walking in the dark

my open eye will watch as you undress
my heart will beg to give yours back
and when the closed eyes lies, to rest
it will water as we laugh
o my soul went with the heart attack

my legs are other where they stand
my arms are murder where they rest
and when the King comes back for his land
i will tell him that no one passed the test
that my words were smothered at my chest

my conscience hears a shallow plea
and to it, i offer up a song
and when it’s time to pay the fee
we will see that it was just the Law
there is no border between Right and Wrong

o Sun, stretch shadows where i fall
o Moon, rise quickly from your arc
and when the courtroom lost it all
i will find my armies in the dark
that my shadow had never left its mark
o my god, i am walking in the dark

lie next to me
pull me from sleep
and if i resist
rip off the sheets

Palms Up

i am caught looking at the ripples in this pool
my body is reflected in this pool
i see my lovers laying hands where i once stood (and they demand)
i am caught looking at this still and haunting pool

i want to feel every sticker of this world
i want to burn in every fire of this world
and if it’s empty, well i think that i’d like to feel that, too
i want to feel all of the numbness of this world

and i have no happiness here
i have nothing but remorse and cowardice here
the sun sets with the ocean’s tears
there is nothing meaning nothing to anything here

i am so tired of the war that’s in my blood!
i am so tired of the war that’s in my blood!
i am so tired of my palms, they’re facing up with no resolve
i am so tired of the war that’s in my blood

hold me in your arms till i sleep no more
gather up my things and make them more
gather up my thoughts and make them paint (demand a lot)
gather up my shame, make me a saint

or just a servant, i would be alright with that
take off my shoes, i would walk barefoot for that
and on my knees, i would knee until the hairs dissolve, and still
from my shins and from my feet the chords resolve

take my eyes, take my mouth into your hands
cuz i never made a single righteous plan
cuz i’m never whole enough to raise a child
and im never old enough to be young and wild

truth be told, i am scared to tell the truth!
cuz i know that the light is in the truth!
and im having so much fun being locked up in the dark
will all the terrors of my dreams and cringing heart

i am a liar if i never knew i was
i am a liar and i always knew i was
won’t you gather me to your righteous arms?
won’t you keep me ever closer to your heart?

---

license

all rights reserved